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About Michael Sansbury

MICHAEL SANSBURY is a lawyer, writer, and beekeeper in Birmingham, Alabama. He is a member of the Cathedral Church of the Advent, where he has played Pontius Pilate, taught Sunday school, and served in the Advent Softball Ministry, which humbles itself each week during the summer so that others may be exalted.

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Author Archive

    Trumping to Conclusions

    In September 2009, after being fired by Air America for the third time, comedian Marc Maron began the WTF podcast. It was born of necessity. Maron was 45 years old with a mediocre comedy career behind him and nothing on the horizon. But he knew a bunch of other comedians, so he sat down with […]

    The Devil Went Down to Georgia

    It’s not every day that my hometown is trending on Facebook, but my wife assured me that it was. Yes, Lilburn, Georgia, was trending because of what Slate has dubbed—in a year that has already seen Kim Kardashian publish a book of selfies—“The Year’s Most Perplexing News Event.” Last week, Lilburn’s TNT Academy hosted an […]

    The Gardner of Eden

    They say ev’rything can be replaced . . . -Bob Dylan, “I Shall Be Released” Twenty-five years ago, Rick Abath, a hippie Berklee College of Music dropout, was working the night shift at the Isabella Stewart Gardner Museum in Boston. Two men dressed as Boston Police officers asked Abath to let them in. When Abath […]

    Thoughts on a Speeding Ticket

    As soon as I came around the bend, I saw the trooper see me and jump into her cruiser. I hadn’t been paying attention to the speedometer as I hurried home, with my wife and children, from my parents’ house. Instead, I’d been engaging in one of my favorite pastimes: criticizing my wife for failing […]

    Manning Down

    We are resentful at being the butts of the divine joke of grace that says nothing matters except plain, old, de facto, yes-Jesus faith. –Robert Capon, Kingdom, Grace, Judgment There are many reasons to admire Peyton Manning. He has a golden arm. He can read defenses like you and I can read a billboard. He […]

    The Nerdy Pharisees

    When I was in college, a group of pledges from one of the socially-elite fraternities on campus painted “NERDS” in large capital letter on the roof of my fraternity’s house. It was a pejorative statement. Until that act of vandalism, we didn’t know that we were nerds. We dressed nicely. We drank a lot. We […]

    On Christian Nakedness (Muy Caliente!)

    Vanity, definitely my favorite sin. –The Devil (as played by Al Pacino) I have a clothing problem. It’s not that I spend too much money on clothes or that I’m obsessed with having the latest fashions. It’s that I put too much importance on what I wear. In 2000, Nicolas Cage starred in The Family […]

    The Selfie on the Mount

    Instagram enhances Facebook’s most essential quality. Facebook allows you to keep in touch with old “friends,” but keeping in touch means subjecting yourself to climate-change rants from that girl who failed biology in high school, college football highlight videos from that guy who never went to college, and (if you’re friends with me) shameless plugging of […]

    Finding Sugar Man

    Some people want to be the President of the United States when they grow up. Some want to win a Nobel Prize. Some want to win a Super Bowl or a World Series. But not me. When I grow up, I want to be a MacArthur Fellow. Every year, the MacArthur Foundation chooses a class […]

    Impossible Takes a Weak

    “Difficult takes a day; impossible takes a week.” -Jay Z “My biggest weakness is that I’m a perfectionist.” This clichéd job-interview response speaks to a wide variety of human frailties: our inability to recognize our own weakness; our inability to admit weakness to ourselves, even if we recognize it; our fear of others judging us […]

    Ron Lester Has the (Varsity) Blues

    Palm Sunday is an annual reminder that what goes up must come down. As if we needed reminding. Remember Varsity Blues? Honestly, I don’t. I never saw the movie. But it was a huge success at the box office, and, as a Friday Night Lights knockoff, it really couldn’t miss, especially since it starred Paul […]

    The Curated Life of Gwyneth Paltrow

    People really hate Gwyneth Paltrow. Last year, Star magazine named her one of “Hollywood’s Most Hated Stars.” But, that same week, she was also named the “World’s Most Beautiful Woman” by People Magazine. That juxtaposition confused Graydon Carter, editor of Vanity Fair, presumably because he prizes beauty above all else. But, to the non-beautiful, the […]